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=========================================================================
Date: Wed, 23 Feb 1994 01:01:42 EST
Sender: New Ways of Thinking List <FNORD-L@UBVM.BITNET>
From: Alfredo Garcia <TIPPY>
Subject: Whipping Postmodern 2
Due to overwhelming popular demand, it's the return of...
Whipping Postmodern: #2 in a series of 64. Collect 'em all!
Didja ever open up a can of dogfood and it smelled like shit?
Didja give it to your dog anyway?
Kathy Acker
=========================================================================
Date: Wed, 23 Feb 1994 07:30:29 EST
Sender: New Ways of Thinking List <FNORD-L@UBVM.BITNET>
From: The Whisperin' Pine <TIPPY>
Subject: Re: ???
And wasn't it Nietzsche who remarked, ah, it seems only yesterday,"Many a
man fails as an original thinker simply because he has too good a memory,"
just before picking up a much-needed spare from a difficult 7-10 split?
Your bowl-by-bowl commentator,
The Disappearing Bust of Voltaire
=========================================================================
Date: Wed, 23 Feb 1994 18:15:54 EST
Sender: New Ways of Thinking List <FNORD-L@UBVM.BITNET>
From: Erich Segal <TIPPY>
Subject: Re: WHAT IS AN FNORD?
Fnord means never having to say you're sorry.
Lefty
Enjoying far too many tubs of slaw
=========================================================================
Date: Wed, 23 Feb 1994 18:27:36 EST
Sender: New Ways of Thinking List <FNORD-L@UBVM.BITNET>
From: The Men in Black <TIPPY>
Subject: Re: Fnords
Discretion is the better part of valor.
Lord Whimsey
On the road again
=========================================================================
Date: Wed, 23 Feb 1994 18:32:06 EST
Sender: New Ways of Thinking List <FNORD-L@UBVM.BITNET>
From: Mary Worth <TIPPY>
Subject: Re: WHAT IS AN FNORD?
With the hype and crass commercialism of the Fnord season well under way
it's easy to lose sight of the true meaning of Fnord. It's not just about
the broken windows, nice though they be, nor is it simply the too-many tubs
of slaw. No, friends, Fnord is more than that. It's a call to arms AND acall
to lay down arms. It's the tortoise AND the hare. It's too many bottles of
cough syrup. It's a chicken in every pot and it's tough on crime. So,friends,
when election time rolls around, I hope you'll remember the broken promises,
the shattered dreams, and vote Fnord, a shabby little over-priced piece of
junk hawked on late night television in between phone-sex ads. Credit cards
only.
Operators standing by...
=========================================================================
Date: Wed, 23 Feb 1994 19:20:38 EST
Sender: New Ways of Thinking List <FNORD-L@UBVM.BITNET>
From: Three-fingered Mickey <TIPPY>
Subject: Re: ???
Man Ray.
Extra straws please,
Alfred Jarry
=========================================================================
Date: Thu, 24 Feb 1994 11:25:23 EST
Sender: New Ways of Thinking List <FNORD-L@UBVM.BITNET>
From: Mark Trail <TIPPY>
Subject: There goes the neighborhood!
As if this isn't already the most run-down piece of urban blight and mental
squalor on the Net, I awaken to find a bunch of drunken Discordians passedout
on my front lawn. Where's the kerosene?
Pappy Yokum
=========================================================================
Date: Thu, 24 Feb 1994 23:03:38 EST
Sender: New Ways of Thinking List <FNORD-L@UBVM.BITNET>
From: "Daniel A. Foss" <DFOSS@CCVM.SUNYSB.EDU>
Organization: State University of New York at Stony Brook
Subject: as much of the real story as leriland ruling circles will
Allow:
===============================================================================Date: Thu, 24 Feb 94 19:58:02 EST
From: "Daniel A. Foss" <DFOSS@CCVM.sunysb.edu>
To: Leri@pyramid.com (Leri)
Subject: Background of Clinton Ass Project & the decline of New
Ways of Thinking:
To many, howeversomuch unreflectingly - broken mirrors? - the project
popularly known to the Broad Masses under Party Direction and Guidance as
Militantly Strive To Transcend Limits and Internal Contradictions of Richard
Anton Wilsonism, or more succintly, Eat it Raw RAW Eats It, is indelibly
fixated along with and fused to the Clinton Assassination Project, apreemptive
private sector venture launched by the Leading Cadres of the Party inkeeping
with the spirit and letter of the World Bank/IMF-dictated Economic Reform,
recently handily defeated in free and open elections by Healthy Forces loyal
to Me alone. First, to the more profitable question of Economic Development.
As has without letup been made emphatically clear, in the pages of Party
Organ FNORD-L@UBVM, subsequently seized in the August Coup and neverrestored
to rightful Peoples Control, we have never had any intention, and ifsolicited
would REFUSE, fear is our business and guns we all know are *dangerous*, we
all saw Carlito's Way, to get mixed up in the assassinating part of theClinton
Assassination. Rather, having learned the lessons of history, not tomention,
as we inevitably will, HISTORY@UBVM, where first we met JJ, The Elusive Gail
(TEG), many other intellectually intriguing women of whom all, when it came
down to unity of theory and praxis proving in a sense disappointing in the
end (coeval with the beginning), "it's your deodorant," TEG actually said,
- "oh the last time I saw philadelphia, my heart was jung and gay, yetwithal
a trifle bisexual" - our utility-maximization function dictates thefollowing
Party Line:
To militantly strive to stuff the walls of Daltons and Waldenbooks, from
mall to shining mall, from the mountains to the prairies, to Long Islandwhite
with snow, goddesses bless armenia long may the money flow, with prepared,
authoritative, indisputable barring any slight will to disbelieve for reason
or reasons yet unimaginable, CONSPIRACY THEORIES of impecably paranoid and
furthermore pirhanoid (argumentationwise) credentialization; no lamebrain
Mark Lanes, Lois Lanes, Shady Lanes, maryland chicken farmers like unohu,
mafia disinformationalists, CIA ditto, Jim Garrisons, Garrison States,THEM's
agentry what might be any one of me, DIA, NSA, stooges thereof, ThreeStooges,
Imperialist Stooges, the whole schmeeer....
We, who have feared this action by the Medical Industrial Complex,developed
mystic healing arts evolved over millenia by pinchpenny pogrom-fearingJewish
heritage to preclude Trading With The Enemy, we alone have been able toprofit
by leaks blurted out by University Hospital - Luke and Laura will confirmthis
- Holistic Healing Clinic Holistic Healer Zorgah Gnott, leading to thefamous
Orange Alert (1); followed by the leaking via a yet-operational backchannel
that the medical-industrial complex, in a moment of brimful overconfidence,
revoked its goahead, "why bother," they said.
Millions of books ended in the toxic waste dump.
Not to mention what was sunk by way of precious foreign exchange. You
have seen all this on the International Political Economy channel <ipe@
csf.Colorado.edu>. IMF/WB ordered further devaluation, belt-tightening,
structural readjustment. Yet no prophecy fails forever; the doom foretold
is at hand, yes, underfoot, even.
Accidents will happen. The death of RAW was not in the cards; we had used
him in the past for cynical propagandist purposes (See our criticallyacclaim-
ed FNORD essay on the Alien and Sedition Acts associated with thepersecution
of the invisible, because nonexistent, conspiracy of the Illuminati. Justask
Joe Provo, when he was just small.) We had every expectation of doing soagain.
Beneath our deeply rooted racially based rivalries, we were brothers underthe
suntan, struggling in the common struggle of the Paranoid Peoples PopularLib-
eration Front, as in Solidarity With The Heroic People of, as theleatherlunged
Young Socialist Alliance, buncha Trotskyists, where else do you get them,yells
in Union Square to this day.
Investigation continues. We could, if we were dirty cheaters, blame some
entity with a mind of his her its own; but among us, folks, restassured,there
aint not, aint never gonna be none, of sucha Thingie.
Goddesses, high and low, will save us; or the other way around. I remind
you, in closing, of the words of Muhammad's representative at the conference
with nearly-defeated Makkans over the Legitimation and Credentialing of the
Deities in the Ka'aba: "Go suck the cunt of Allat!" That, I suggest, it not
such a lousy idea at this time.(2)
Daniel A. Foss
Notes:
1. Those with elephantiasis of the memory recall that the sorceristic demon
Marty Schneider, Chair of Pol Sci, who is to this day persecuting me, caused
by magick spell my privy member to fall off. Holistic Healer Zorgah Gnott,
you likewise recall, called me one morning the following week to chirp that
said privy member had been Found; what's more, she said, reinstalled as I
slept. All I need do was show up at the Clinic to pay the bill, which, once
paid and done with, she licked my earlobe and burbled that Clinton would be
killed any day. Also, I myself was suspect as "the wrong kind of doctor,"
that is, not a "health care profiteer." I might yet save myself by timely
defection yet. Rather, I gave the order for Orange Alert, with all theOrange
Pills at my disposal.
Psychotic Episodes of the story appeared on the Progressive Sociologists
Network <PSN@csf.Colorado.edu> and General Anthropology Bulletin Board
<ANTHRO-L@UBVM.BITNET> at the time.
2. Maxime Rodinson, Muhammad [somethingorotheriforget]. For another view,
Salman Rushdie, The Satanic Verses, 1989, hidden along with Salman Rushdie
himself under my bed since General Aidid moved out.
=========================================================================
Date: Sat, 26 Feb 1994 00:26:25 EST
Sender: New Ways of Thinking List <FNORD-L@UBVM.BITNET>
From: Amana Freezer <TIPPY>
Subject: The Life of the Mind
Part One: Magick Without Brains
On Cosmogeny
>The universe certainly is not a coincedence. Because if it wasthen...forget
>it.
Chaos Explained
>Chaos though...well, it as an explanation shall do for now.
The World Through HIS Eyes
>In this world it's is very understandable to believe that Chaos is all.
On the Repeal of Natural Law and the Necessity of a Spiritual Compass
>Sadly though we as humans have strayed so far from the path that thenaturasl
>laws which govern (in order) our universe have been blotted out almostentire-
>ly, except by the wise eyes of some magi, hindu adepts, and yoghees.{And
apparently the Kidd.-AF}
On Crowley and Spelling
>Magick spelled that way has other value than being silly.
On Infinity
>Chaos does contain everything & their opposite/antithesis.
Revealed! The Ultimate Secret
>But I'll tell you something else, something else contains chaos, andalways
>has from before the beginning. {One wag suggested this might, in fact,be
the thought processes of the Kidd. We feel this may be rather harsh, andapo-
logize to any thought processes which may be offended by suchassociation.-AF}
Next week-A Tappan Gas Range examines the Kidd's controversial views on the
Clinton Health Care Package and skateboarding.
=========================================================================
Date: Sat, 26 Feb 1994 22:50:22 EST
Sender: New Ways of Thinking List <FNORD-L@UBVM.BITNET>
From: "Daniel A. Foss" <DFOSS@CCVM.SUNYSB.EDU>
Organization: State University of New York at Stony Brook
Subject: remember Janie Johnson from the old days?
===============================================================================Date: Thu, 24 Feb 94 18:51:54 EST
From: "Daniel A. Foss" <DFOSS@CCVM.sunysb.edu>
To: Leri@pyramid.com (Leri)
Subject: reinforcements cum confession of negligence
Organization: State University of New York at Stony Brook
Note: In old header below, preserved for historic purposes, typo should
be emended to "Assassination."
------------------------------------------------------------------------ 53
Date: Thu, 24 Feb 94 18:11:26 EST
From: "Daniel A. Foss" <DFOSS@ccvm.sunysb.edu>
Organization: State University of New York at Stony Brook
Subject: I killed Richard Anton Wilson--Clinton Assination went of
To: Janie Xavier Johnson <jxjohnson@>
Message-Id: <940224.181126.EST.DFOSS@ccvm.sunysb.edu>
off the rails:
JJ,
Missed you, ya old buzzard, what brought this on is the worst travesty
to menace the feminist project in Internet history. Name of Lizzy/"Doctress
Neutopia." You have got brains, height, and weight on her. Virginity is
herewith permanently pardoned; Lizzy represents worse threat to the good
(?) name of mammalian reproductive lifestyle than anything you didn't do.
You are herewith ordered by PARANOIDS FOR TOTAL FEAR INTERNATIONAL to reopen
Little Rock office. Also, JOIN, or use PF11, <Leri@gossip.pyramid.com>:Just
simply <har har> send usual e-mail to leri-request@gossip.pyramid.com,with
body of msg reading subscribe leri (omit Earth name if still use one). This
gets you a File back from majordomo@gossip.pyramid.com telling you to send
another e-mail with identical message to latter address. Save the file if
for perverted reason tempted to unsub. Message connects you with security
screening bureau if your dossier is flagged (unlikely); with other software
which doesn't care at all that holy temple of your body is pure of Drugs,
you refuse to use antihistamines which get you tripped out; or that youteach
Psychology of Women from virginal perspective, which is an ageold Christian
Thingie anyhow. Start getting in shape by running on foot back & forthfrom
Little Rock to Fayeteville, making a circuit of all UArk campuses warning
them of imminent menace. Lick your weight in wildcats as usual; this writer
no longer cares how many wildcats that takes.
Proposal of marriage will be accepted on same basis as any other woman
holding most.favored.nation status.
I invented metasexism on Leri yesterday; am now coding metafeminism to
wipe it out again; spreading faster than planned, may need your debuggery.
Viruses and memes, both.
On a personal note, missed you, you old Clinton double agent, you. Have
told the world how you were ruined for life by collision of shopping carts
with future evil emperor of armenia in frozen foods section of Grand Union
(in the South, a Grand Union?) in Fayeteville AR, home of flagship campus
of State U. Have framed UALR t-shirt. Pray your God and my assortedGoddesses
none of which of course exist to spare you Budget Cuts in this world and the
world to come.
This message heralds your arrival in Leriland, self-styled.
Love, spiritual, once again,
Daniel A. Foss,
<National Order of Wombats>
cc: Leri@gossip.pyramid.com
=========================================================================
Date: Mon, 28 Feb 1994 15:06:50 -0400
Sender: New Ways of Thinking List <FNORD-L@UBVM.BITNET>
From: "/R=SOURCE/R=AM/U=LESSER/FFN=scott lesser/"
Subject: RECRUITMENT DRIVE
Dateline: MY REALITY CONSTRUCT, February 28, 1994.
(For Immediate Release)
Possibly imaginary organization existing in at least the consciousness of an
insignificant para-professional office clerk during times of manic raving,
seeks 144,000 men and women (in the ratio of 49/51%) willing to parlay agood
time into world domination, for the goal and purpose of destroying alldogmatic
systems of control.
Must be willing to paint body blue, free self of sexual inhibitions, createand
destroy without judgement, and have no fear of the risk of situations that
could possibly cause dismemberment. Some travel also possible.
Ability to operate flame-throwers and cloudbusters helpful. Applicants whocan
translate ancient Greek and speak fluent Hebrew may qualify for bonus karmic
reimbursement. Familiarity with ritual magick of any tradition a plus.
Send resumes via e-mail to LESSER. Telepathic interviews will be
scheduled at a later date.
We're an equal opportunity employer.
scott lesser, A'A'
spokesperson for solomon nathan eleazar
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