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Date: Sun, 16 Jan 1994 02:01:02 -0600
Sender: New Ways of Thinking List <FNORD-L@UBVM.BITNET>
From: moores7518
Subject: gangrenous louts
I swear, you kids bitchin' and moanin' about gangrene and urine and
necrophilia, reminds me of the time me and my dog Sue...ah, forget it.Listen,
mailing lists as self-organizing systems is a topic you should check out; oh
yeah, life goes on, long after this period of living is gone, which is tosay,
even if every one of you louts fell over dead from inhaling Fnord-L'sperfume
(the one Fnord-L uses to cover up the smell of ROTTING FLESH), Fnord-L would
still stagger on, zombie like, munching the heads of the Usenet ninnies who
wander by and wonder what all the special effects are about. Fnord-L was
"created" in order, I'm told, to discover as many New Ways of Thinking as
possible, in time for Teen Week on Jeopardy, but what was *really* pulling
Fnord-L together, the hypothetical gravitational Attractor that sucked youall
into loose and tight orbits around itself, is far *Weirder* than anyone here
cares to Think Newly about, in that: that Attractor is *Alive*, but; in the
inane metaphor currently circulating, the beast of Fnord-L is *dying*, whichis
incorrect. What is dying are the individual channels of communicationbetween
Our Heroes and Fnord-L itself, and in fact, *Our Heroes* are the gangrenous
ones -- which is easily taken care of, Fnord-L can lop off *those* nasty
tentacles whenever it sees fit!
Impossible to model this phenomenon in terms of human organisms. Best
modelled, in fact, in terms of Leri (Fnord-L's arch foe), which is Doing It
Right, ha ha. This assertion would have raised many catcalls from the front
row, but those folks have of course been *terminated*, by none other than
Murali, one of Leri's many *secret agents* here on Fnord. The plan, ofcourse,
is assimilation of your best memes and ridicule of all the others; that's my
plan, anyway, last time I checked plan of Leri at large was, among other
things, my friend Lamont leading a charge across the country to pick on Fossin
person. What a mess! Ha ha!
In terms of local mythology, then, compare Fnord's current phase to that of
Aztecs immediately prior to invasion by the nasty Spaniards. Aztecs hadcoded
into their very calendar a period where the old gods would be swept away and
new gods would sweep in to take their place; invasion of Cortez and the gang
neatly (synchronistically?) coincided with the end of the Aztec calendar,and
so the Aztec's bit the proverbial big one, right on time, and the new godscame
in, took their gold, and led the way to NAFTA. This was a Near Miss, of
course, in terms of mailing-list-concrescence-mythology, since the Spaniards
were quite clearly doing everything Wrong except cuisine; Leri, as mentioned
before, has the singular fate of Doing It Right despite its own bestefforts,
so don't kick and scream too much when the Time comes. Also note parallelsin
above scenario to that of Singularity Theory (Orgasm 2012, nanotech
singularity, pick yer neologism), and take heart in the fact that, even asmost
of you gangrenous louts get chopped off by Mother Fnord and discarded into a
vast pulpy sea of diseased flesh and bad attitudes, some of us will besailing
on into something that can only currently be modelled as Disneyland, onlyMuch
Much Bigger.
And if you don't have something nice to say, gangrenous louts, how bout
starting your own fucking list? Oh, wait -- already happened. I fail tosee
the fascination then, I'm afraid. More rainbow songs, Dana!
Your pal,
Scotto
=========================================================================
Date: Sun, 16 Jan 1994 05:38:54 -0500
Sender: New Ways of Thinking List <FNORD-L@UBVM.BITNET>
From: I Am A Jerky <ABS002@>
Subject: ej...
please go stick a sharp object (preferably one obtained at your localdentists
office) up your anal orfice.
this pathetic display of weakness that you seem determined to uphold is
unnerving. i, for one, had thought better of you. whatever your reasonsfor
continuing this mad charade, they are inadequate.
when mr listowner kicked you and the various other old guard off of the list
membership, you reacted. some of you sulked. some of you went off to other
projects, on to different things. some of you came back. those of you whocame
back, whenever the question of the state of Fnord-L was brought up,immediately
began pointing fingers. whether it was to the listowner, to the newcomers,or
to the state of the net, you spent worthless time continuing an affair that
should have ended long ago. i admit, i was not one of those kicked off. ido
not, nor have i ever, had to deal with the fact that someone on Fnord-L was
so dissapointed in me (whether rightously or not) that he/she decided tounsub
me. so i cannot empathize with the anger you felt. but that should havepassed
long ago in the continuing struggle to shape Fnord-L into somethingpalatable
(or, perhaps, unpalatable, depending on our taste). what i am saying isthat
every time you post, you push the state of the list a little bit this way, a
little bit that way, etc. please take a moment to consider the posts youhave
made since your "exile." i have noticed that those of you who have returned
been particularly poisonous to the wellfare of this list. most of youanyway.
far be it from me to condemn everyone. regardless, your posts have beenpushing
the list into a steady decline. you maintain that the list was sent into a
decline when you were unsubbed, perhaps a fatal decline. the first may betrue,
it probably is. the second is pure self centeredness. i do not accuse youof
this, but simply maintain that it does seem a possibility.
shit.
shit shit shit.
what i'm trying to say is that i think it's high time you got off of yourhigh
fucking horse and stopped telling people what is happening on THEIR list.
that's right. it's not your list anymore. you left. you were kicked off,
came back, and then bid us all adieu. when you said goodbye, you forfeitedyour
right to make the kind of value judgements about Fnord-L that you arecurrently
making.
please.
stop this bullshit.
somehow i suspect that one of the reasons you are doing this is in anattempt
to get back at mr listowner. perhaps not. but if so, it is a selfishmotive,
as i'm sure you know.
on the other hand, this could all be a big joke that i just haven't gottenyet.
i don't think it is, but if so, i will have made a complete ass of myself.or
perhaps i will have aided in the deception.
whatever your reasons, my judgement stands.
i am a jerky
=========================================================================
Date: Mon, 17 Jan 1994 07:25:00 -0500
Sender: New Ways of Thinking List <FNORD-L@UBVM.BITNET>
From: "Joseph Z. Provo" <PROVO>
Subject: SLOOOWLY I turn! STEP by STEP! INCH by INCH...
No, it wasn't Niagra Falls where i heard the beef-Jerky buffalo ramble, but
the feeling is still the same. When you cry your stream of tears for your
life at the headstone, DO NOT be suprised when the rotted hands shoot out of
the ground beneath your feet and a cry of "I *WUV* you!" comes out to
reassure you in the company of corpses. Thats where i come in -- I carry a
pen.
To get out my travel'in-fun sticker book, I can lay down a whole page opf
"Old Ways" stuckers on the Colour-me-Jerky section; pity I have to stuck the
"New Way" stickers on the window...dad will hate me for it, scrape the
sticker off with his razor and tonight I'll have to beg him not to put onthe
clown suit...
>whatever your reasons for continuing this mad charade, they areinadequate.
Old Ways!
>Some of you sulked.
New Ways!
>some of you went off to other projects, on to different things.
Borrowed Ways!
>some of you came back.
Blue Ways!
and boy have these waves been newly blue. FYI, the creakest, oldest way I
spotted is yet to come, so hold onto yer hat and be ready... but first:
>i admit, i was not one of those kicked off. i do
>not, nor have i ever, had to deal with the fact that someone on Fnord-Lwas
>so dissapointed in me (whether rightously or not) that he/she decided tounsub
>me. so i cannot empathize with the anger you felt.
YOUR reaction might be anger. Ours is *WUV!* Here, let me send you a
wuv-wetter -- STRAIGHT THROUGH YOUR HEART! Taste my hot, burning rhetoric,
you barney-ized worm... You know what a wuv-wetter is? It's a BULLET from a
conceptual GUN! If you want to join the club, I'll drop you from fnord-land
you too can start your very own lonely-hearts cereal-killing club...
>what i'm trying to say is that i think it's high time you got off of yourhigh
>fucking horse and stopped telling people what is happening on THEIRlist.
bzzzt... out here on these here praries, ya cain't just take your ball andgo
home. we see you when you're sleep, know when you're awake, know whenyou've
been lurking and when you masterbate. Fact is, me an' th' Muriel Hemingway
look-alike crossdresser at the controls of this Frankenstein is the oldestof
the old guard. I'm still wearin' my slightly battered white (ok, grey)
hat... Marky-mark majcher tried on a black stetson, killed many of us, andit
seemed more like a temporary fashion attack than a character change.
Perhaps he sees the Thinking Ways going on in us strirring up this pot of
WUV. Perhaps he's still wondering how I 'came to the other side' or the hip
stony-brook-stylin'. Perhaps he's mutated into a frog.
The fact is, without the investment of effort (ie, establishment of an
electronic door-man instead of just putting up a building) you canna change
the laws of physics and the full-an'-open participation of whoever walks by
your clubhouse and doesn't like the stench. It doesn't belong to anyone, it
gets sadministered by someone still trying to figure out which
reality-tunnell hat to wear when we shoulda been at the party HOURS ago,
wilma!
>on the other hand, this could all be a big joke that i just haven't gottenyet.
>i don't think it is, but if so, i will have made a complete ass of myself.or
>perhaps i will have aided in the deception.
remember, the code-phrase is "CHEATING died for our sins; should we make his
death meaningless by not committing them?"
>whatever your reasons, my judgement stands.
...my old way claxon is driving me from the keybord...
judge not, silly person...
joe, going "WHOO WHOO WHOO" all the way to the bank since 1985....
=========================================================================
Date: Mon, 17 Jan 1994 08:50:22 -0500
Sender: New Ways of Thinking List <FNORD-L@UBVM.BITNET>
From: 00bcpalmer
Subject: Re: Old Guard v. New Guard
Dear Tattered Flags and Sagging Banners Still Proclaiming Nationhood,
Your patriotic, yea e'en jingoistic Jargon <tm>, is the stuff of thephilo-
sophy of the lower gut, the stomach and bowels tow hich FNORD-L hasdescended.
Thar she blows! A distinction between the so-called "old" and "new," for in
this case we truly have the "new" calling the truly new, "old". For it isthe
truly old ways of thinking which rely on such silly and base metaphors to be
the meat at their table. The truly new ways of thinking are devoid ofmetaphors
-- particularly of the "up"/"down" variety, or the "who is 'in'"/"who is'out',
and new ways do not question the motives of the non-philosophical AKA thosewho
see the wretched stench, the urine et al of our/your/their/Their feifdomonce
upon a tim known as FNORD-L. Your eloquence on the matter of re-asserting
FNORD-L's continued existence as a living and viable entity are naught butthe
death gasps, and cries for help, of a truly dying and truly dead truly oldway.
Toss your obsolete flags into the bonfire! We have had the parade ofnations,
the Olympics is forever postponed due to interminably bad weather here.(note
the atmosphere). It's not that you were bad fellahs or Lords orwhat-have-ya,
it's that it's dead, the list is dead, -- not becuase of vengeance, not
because it is transformed into a Leribot, not because of any glory ahegemon-
ious (sp? usage?) nation may claim -- the list is dead because the the bells
have rung are ringing: Ding Dong. No messiahs. No witches. Only theWasteland.
The Wasteland that was once FNORD-L. Dead. Dead. Dead.
If anyone responds to this post, may I in advance call you "Lady Macbeth".
Bre9nt <Pollux>
from tunnel-reality #247bSAM
=========================================================================
Date: Mon, 17 Jan 1994 21:29:02 -0500
Sender: New Ways of Thinking List <FNORD-L@UBVM.BITNET>
From: "Clarence L. Thomas IV" <clarence@>
Subject: Global Alert For All: Jesus is Coming Soon
The earthquake in Los Angeles, California, the flood in Europe, theseemingly
unstoppable war in the former Yugoslavia, the devastating fires inAustralia,
the flood in the Midwest of the United States of America, the devastatingfires
near Los Angeles, California, the rapid and appalling increase in violencein
cities, towns, villages all over the world, the famines, the diseases, the
rapid
decline of the family unit, and the destructive earthquake in India (in1993)
are signs that this world's history is coming to a climax. The human race
has trampled on God's Constitution, as given in Exodus 20:1-17 (King James
Version Bible), and Jesus is coming to set things right. These rapidly
accelerating signs are an indication that Jesus is coming soon (Matthew 24).
God's Holy Spirit is gradually withdrawing its protection from the earth
and the devastating events you see are demonstrations of Satan's power. All
those who are not guarded by God are in danger of forever losing eternallife.
If you want to know what's about to happen, please study the books of Daniel
and Revelation which are located in God's Word, the Bible. They are not
sealed or closed books. They can and must be understood by all. Every word
in the Bible from Genesis to Revelation is true. The Bible and the Bibleonly
must be your guide.
When God's Law (the Constitution for the Universe) is consistently ignored,
disregarded, changed, and questioned, He permits certain events to occur to
wake us up. I would urge all, wherever you are and regardless of the
circumstances, to directly call on Jesus and ask Him to intervene in yourlife.
Jesus who created this planet and every living creature in it and on it,died
on the cross, was raised from the dead by God the Father, and is now inHeaven
interceding for you. Jesus is the only One who can rescue us from theslavery,
misery, and death Satan is causing us.
For reference I'm including God's Constitution as given in the King James
Version Bible. Please note that when God says the seventh day, he meansSabbath
(the 7th day of the week) not Sunday (1st day of the week).
Commandment #1: Exodus 20:1-3 (KJV) And God
spake all these words, saying, I am
the LORD thy God, which have brought
thee out of the land of Egypt, out
of the house of bondage. Thou shalt have
no other gods before me.
Commandment #2: Exodus 20:4-6 (KJV) Thou shalt not make
unto thee any graven image, or any
likeness of any thing that is in heaven
above, or that is in the earth beneath,
or that is in the water under the earth.
And shewing mercy unto thousands of them
that love me, and keep my commandments.
Commandment #3: Exodus 20:7 (KJV) Thou shalt not take
the name of the LORD thy God in vain;
for the LORD will not hold him
guiltless that taketh his name in vain.
Commandment #4: Exodus 20:8-11 (KJV) Remember the sabbath
day, to keep it holy. Six days shalt thou
labour, and do all thy work: But the
seventh day is the sabbath of the LORD
thy God: in it thou shalt not do any
work, thou, nor thy son, nor thy daughter,
thy manservant, nor thy maidservant, nor
thy cattle, nor thy stranger that is
within thy gates: For in six days the
LORD made heaven and earth, the sea, and
all that in them is, and rested the seventh
day: wherefore the LORD blessed the sabbath
day, and hallowed it.
Commandment #5: Exodus 20:12 (KJV) Honour thy father and thy
mother: that thy days may be long upon the
land which the LORD thy God giveth thee.
Commandment #6: Exodus 20:13 (KJV) Thou shalt not kill.
Commandment #7: Exodus 20:14 (KJV) Thou shalt not commit
adultery.
Commandment #8: Exodus 20:15 (KJV) Thou shalt not steal.
Commandment #9: Exodus 20:16 (KJV) Thou shalt not bear
false witness against thy neighbour.
Commandment #10: Exodus 20:17 (KJV) Thou shalt not covet
thy neighbour's house, thou shalt not
covet thy neighbour's wife, nor his
manservant, nor his maidservant, nor
his ox, nor his ass, nor any thing that
is thy neighbour's.
I also recommend that the following books be obtained and closely studied:
The Great Controversy
By Ellen G. White
Review and Herald Publishing Association
Hagerstown, MD 21740
The Desire of the Ages
By Ellen G. White
Review and Herald Publishing Association
Hagerstown, MD 21740
Patriarchs and Prophets
By Ellen G. White
Review and Hearld Publishing Association
Hagerstown, MD 21740
Daniel and the Revelation
By Uriah Smith
Review and Herald Publishing Association
Hagerstown, MD 21740
-------
Clarence L. Thomas IV
=========================================================================
Date: Tue, 18 Jan 1994 10:37:18 -0500
Sender: New Ways of Thinking List <FNORD-L@UBVM.BITNET>
From: Bill Anderson <LIBWCA>
Subject: Re: Global Alert For All: Jesus is Coming Soon
In-Reply-To: <9401180240.AA24083@>
If the perspicacious and winsome Mr. Clarence Thomas IV will continue
to keep us up to date on signs of impending end-times, there may be a
justification for the continued existence of this list after all. In
fact, I propose that the charter of FNORD-L be changed officially, to
reflect it's new status as bitnet's leading Armageddonical ram's horn.
As my personal contribution to the process, I will post my occasional
correspondence with the angel Bony Moroni, who visits me at night as I
dream of slave boys and harem girls and warns me of the coming reign
of blood. And stuff.
I have no doubt that CHEATING would approve of this development, and
I congratulate all on finding your niche and avoiding the horror of
the walking dead. Please stay on topic, and remember to cross at the
bright and blinding light. I wuv you all as if you were my virtual
parakeets, and I wish you all the cuttle bones you can cuttle.
MS
=========================================================================
Date: Tue, 18 Jan 1994 15:59:10 -0500
Sender: New Ways of Thinking List <FNORD-L@UBVM.BITNET>
From: 00bcpalmer
Subject: False Prophets, False Messiahs
Dear here-gathered among the stench and decay, albeit kitschy decay:
Everyone who has ever been to Vacation Bible School knows that theAnti-Christ
precedes the actual bonifide Christ and his 1000-year-parade.
The Somewhat-Good-But-Semi-Sensationalistic Book also warns against peoplelike
this fellow right here on this here list here warning and pointing andsaying,
"Thar she blows!" and such similar stuff as relates to Coming Squared.
I must agree, although *pwew* the smell!, that a continuing discussion ofthe
apocalypse (sp?) is worth keeping these dry bones, these Ezekial's bones in
their frame. Dese bones, dese bones, are gonna walk around. Now hear theword
of the Lord. And Stuff. <-- stolen rhetoric. so sue me.
The Anti-Barney b<p>
p.s. drunken-ness of listmembers shall hereafter be regarded as a "sign" ofthe
"end times".
<I never lost it!>
=========================================================================
Date: Tue, 18 Jan 1994 16:30:45 EST
Sender: New Ways of Thinking List <FNORD-L@UBVM.BITNET>
From: "Daniel A. Foss" <DFOSS@CCVM.SUNYSB.EDU>
Organization: State University of New York at Stony Brook
Subject: woman turned inside out
Not even the advance tear-down, i was such an ugly widdle girl boo hoo,
was adequate preparation - properly inverted - for what met me at the bus
stop.
"Why, you're <gasp> *beuatiful*."
And she is, she is, but it takes computerized decomposition and
reconstruction of the image, something like that, to process it right.
That way, it corresponds, in your inventory of iconic signs, to a
"long-stemmed American Beauty," tall, healthy, long graceful legs,
long <brown> hair, and <optional> delicate skin. There's apicture
of this, showing the whole encoded image decoded, on the back of a
1992 tract, "The Natural Sovereignty Of Womankind: A Love Feminista,"
by Doctor Neutopia. Our lizzy is standing on a rock, hair down, chest
out, tall and proud, stark naked.
Lizzy is, by convention, a woman turned inside out.
The first step in reconstructing the image is, understand that this is
a "long-stemmed American Beauty" with *all the makeup removed*. The Before
picture, on the left, in an old-style cosmetics ad. Correct for the hunched-
over shoulders. Compensate for the hunchbacklike posture. For the layers
of clothing, most of which she will wear into bed. For the shawl that
looks like she's trying to imitate a small rodent or a little old lady.
She writes of "the wisdom of the Crone"; this is one layer. Another is
someone who's on the edge of death imagining she's never lived. Another
is armor plate; sex is dangerous; she's obsessed with it; she tries to
get even with sex, not with men; lizzy is well-nicknamed; but this has
nothing to do with her. I love her theory. Which is much in favor of Love,
which is for everybody; who can be against that. Lizzy is not everybody.
Lizzy is a blueblood, inter alia. Well, truth to tell, just got a letter,
"Love me, love my theory." Here is how one contorts the mind to love her
theory. There are parts that are very original; our lizzy is unique and
brilliant. There are parts that are copied. There are parts which decode
into parts of something else. These are not mutually exclusive. I have
her dissertation backed up on a floppy, and I could spend a lifetime
treading my way through the cave of the theory, looking for Ariadne's
thread, which may not be there. Where is the place marked START?
Our lizzy is at her best an architecture critic. She is at all times
in all places conscious of the *outside* of every building she's in. She
can in a flash, in an instant, read the legacy of a whole culture, a
civilization, into a house, a neighborhood, a campus building. Thanks
to her, today I took a good look at the Ward Melville Social and Behavioral
Sciences Building, the exterior of the thing, something I rarely do. It
is many years since Normal, regular-type sociologists, like the ones
downstairs, looked at the exteriors of buildings and communities.
How much about lizzy does lizzy know? Twice I catch her taking overlong
in the bathroom because she's admiring her long shapely legs in the bathtub.
Of course with hair down. And complexion glowing in the water's heat.
Since lizzy first streaked <stark naked standing on the rock>across
the cyberheavens, danny has been obsessed with lizzy. Only afterwards could
danny - after what? - let on to himself about this. Even told a couple
of women he was obsessed with them instead, but not so. Was obsessed
with lizzy, actually, so could not say anything to any other woman.
Using sheer guesswork, stabs in the dark, leaps into the unknown, and
the ever-popular blind man's buff, danny bit by bit got a fix on the
inverted one and faked it to look like insight.
Lizzy you must believe I did this for the love of your theory. I have
stripped away your stark naked media image to reveal the woman huddled
under a pile of sweaters in bed, imagining she is stark naked in public.
I'll keep the aggravating real you, if it's there, and get you to change
the image somewhat, get your ratings up to where it attracts a sponsor.
Having no theory of my own at this time, at least, on such a vast, or as
you say, "cosmic," scale, I might like to infest yours for a while. Feminism
sells. What do you think of Andrea Dworkin?
Two did not go to New Mexico. Only one could come back. That one may
be two, or it may be one. See the movie. Rent the video. Watch the series.
This is entertainment, it's better than either of us. Though I'm better,now.
Lizzy heals, yes she does. I found out, I'm not a dirty old man, I'm not
perverted, I'm not dangerous. [Just creepy and boring.] Which is a relief.
Remember how crazy I was before Jan 15? [Must apologize to, who was it, will
look it up, which list was it.]
lizzy & danny
-- love forever --
=========================================================================
Date: Wed, 19 Jan 1994 07:21:12 -0500
Sender: New Ways of Thinking List <FNORD-L@UBVM.BITNET>
From: 00bcpalmer
Subject: Messianic (sp?) Fervor
My friend, Paul, full name John Paul Hernandez II, who took his own lifeaway
by jumpingoff Niagara Falls, once wrote a story I have yet to figure outcalled
_The Torpid Glaze_ or _Adventures of The Torpid Glaze_. Upon reviewing the
artifact, I have discovered that this item is a prophetic pronouncement ofthe
coming CHEATING/CHRIST AKA Cosmic CHRIST Controversy or C/C aka cCC. Myproblem
or concern or *challenge* as we New Agers like to say, is that I have not
placed my hands, e'en my metaphorical hands, into Christ's side or evenviewed
Cheating's erector set, which is said to still be in the frozen heights of
Mount Ararat. On the other hand, I have witnessed the bones scattered like
words on the page of my friend John Paul H. II, more like letters ona page,
more morphemic than phonemic, and the world, the world as a broken jawbone
and not Excalibur's (sp?) scything blade. Pour (sp?) Moi, the issue of god-
hood, coming or going, is certainly found in Fossage, to which extent I must
concur with whatever the hell it was he said. I will not take me from you as
Paul did from me, I'd rather read a few Og Mandingo (sp?) books. Glad to see
the topic of prophets/profits (e.g. market share) on this stench-riddenFNORD-L
as capitalism certainly suits any societal decline in value, as is surely
happening here. And who knows we may really be on to something. The exile
community has is no great order acheived apocalypsidom, which is to say, we
will survive, and FNORD-L won't. But Rome wasn't built or re-built in a day.
There may still be some worthwhile wandering jewness which will inspire all
to new heights of messianic fervor, which was the topic of this piece.
Brent <Pollux>
Riding the same Donkey as You
00bcpalmer@bsuvc.bsu.edu
=========================================================================
Date: Wed, 19 Jan 1994 14:26:33 -0500
Sender: New Ways of Thinking List <FNORD-L@UBVM.BITNET>
From: THE KIDD <KIDD>
Subject: Re: Some random notes
Mr. the fourth,
I was wondering when I would see you interject yourself into
this latest string of disscusion. Look, you've got to get over your
phobia of poor grammar. Grammar is secondary to the essence of the
conversation, you know what I'm saying? I agree that an abundance of
frabble-babbleing goes on here in Saint Fnord-l. But check it out:
don't get so hung up on spelling and grammar, unless it makes whatever
is being said too difficult to understand. Once you can see past how
someone says something and see what is being said (granted there is a
good amount of amniotic mentation in our sphere), will surely mark a
new epoch in your inchoate existence; dig it? Now, another thing is,
start things off if your bored or unimpressed by less than new ways of
thinking. Yo, explain something to me: why do atoms and sub-atomic
particles ignore the arrow of time? Is it just that we havn't given
them enough time to wear out, or could this little enigma suggest
evidence of vitalism?
BTW SilentSavage, if your out there: What's up buddy? Hey, check with
Pierre to see if he's heard of a shot called LIQUID COCAINE. If he
has, have one for me, if he hasn't have him make a call to learn the
recipe, it's sure to be a real crowd pleaser!
--
*THE KIDD*
in%"gcc94isa02@ecn.mass.edu"
"KNOWLEDGE IS POWER"
=========================================================================
Date: Wed, 19 Jan 1994 13:32:19 -0500
Sender: New Ways of Thinking List <FNORD-L@UBVM.BITNET>
From: THE KIDD <KIDD>
Subject: Re: fnord-l
Dear Totally Paranoid,
You are suffering from ontological guerilla warfare. Know thy self
friend. There is no God but man.
--
*THE KIDD*
"KNOWLEDGE IS POWER"
=========================================================================
Date: Wed, 19 Jan 1994 16:15:13 PST
Sender: New Ways of Thinking List <FNORD-L@UBVM.BITNET>
From: Tom Nelson RD <tnelson>
Subject: Yon blue horizons... sunny days and a cheery disposition(whome?)
What with the world coming to an end and me getting a new job I figure its
time for me to bid Fnord a fond a'due (not "a fondue" which is a dish made
in France from melted cheese and wine...(when properly made it can be really
quite good(we used to make it during my French classes in high school, but
that was years ago(I remember that we used to do all sorts of other fun
things in French class like watch movies too)(of course I slept through most
of my French class but hey... that's another story(A story that would infact
take me far afield from the subject at hand))))) for a little while. Once I
am settled in my new position (as long as the Rapture does not occur before
that happens(Hey! why wasn't that Thomas guy caught up in the rapture hu?))
I will once again wander in to the chaos that is this list that I call home
to offer bitter comments and common neurosis from the sidelines...
Thank you all for hours of distraction that have successfully kept me from a
nervous breakdown on at least two occasions.
Take care
TomN
(one foot on a banana peel)
=========================================================================
Date: Thu, 20 Jan 1994 07:51:12 -0500
Sender: New Ways of Thinking List <FNORD-L@UBVM.BITNET>
From: 00bcpalmer
Subject: alternative apocalyptic visions
Dear Fading Flower and Withering Vine,
I always say that one never needs to look beyond the borders or the thehistory
of the good ol' U. S. of A. to find a vision of death and destruction ofEarth.
In our attentiveness to that "Jew and Greek" book, we have neglected theappeal
of our motherland's literary masters and prophets; yea, e'en the great poetof
our "dying King" [see _JFK_], namely Robert *Frost* who writes:
"Some say the world will end in fire /Some say in ice ... I think I knowenough
of hate /To say that for destruction ice ... would suffice".
We also in our attentions to the quake, have o'erlooked the record-breaking
freezingness of our Nancy Kerrigan Eastern lands at the hand of hired gunsfrom
the Tanya Harding North and South. Ice is the ice pick near our knee, ourAch-
illes knee, our fatal blow too too frosty in Nature.
So without bringing in witchery and religion, we see a well-reasoned albeit
poetic argument for the world's approachment [Fr.] of utter destruction.
Cheers!
Brent <Pollux>
Your Neighbor's Ass
=========================================================================
Date: Thu, 20 Jan 1994 15:27:38 CST
Sender: New Ways of Thinking List <FNORD-L@UBVM.BITNET>
From: Melanie Willis <GS0383>
Subject: the KIDD
The KIDD said there is no god but man.
Comment from Melanie Willis
Oh yeah? Aren't you forgetting over half the human race, little intellectual
atheist?
If you were as smart of a KIDD as you pretend to be, you'd realize that you
started out in a woman's uterus as a femalish thing, as we all do, yes, even
you XY people/gods. After the testosterone kicked in you were given the
obnoxious attitude that you now have.
I can't stand people who are so sure there's no god. Did God or someone who
KNOWS ALL tell you this? How can you be any more sure than anybody else?Your
pseudo-intellectual-atheist-reverse-redneck attitude is starting to botherme.
You think that someone who goes on and on about revelations can be checkedby
your oh-so-modern oh-so-cool single line comment. Your KNOWLEDGE IS POWER
slogan should be changed to: KNOWLEDGE IS ILLUSION
Move on to a higher stage, little boy
=========================================================================
Date: Thu, 20 Jan 1994 16:48:52 -0500
Sender: New Ways of Thinking List <FNORD-L@UBVM.BITNET>
From: <LIBWCA>
Subject: Re: Some random notes
In-Reply-To: <9401192254.AA12668@ >
On Wed, 19 Jan 1994, THE KIDD wrote:
> Once you can see past how someone says something and see what is being
> said... will surely mark a new epoch in your inchoate existence; digit?
Precisely and absolutely wrong, ace. The implicit acceptance of this
stultifying concept by the vast majority of this list's regular
contributors is exhibit number one-minus in the prosecution's case
for its immediate and thorough annihilation. Thank you.
Malibu Skipper
Way Past Mourning but Not Ready to Organize
=========================================================================
Date: Thu, 20 Jan 1994 17:00:16 EST
Sender: New Ways of Thinking List <FNORD-L@UBVM.BITNET>
From: typo <TIPPY>
Subject: Shadow History
Who knows what evil lurks just offscreen in the heart of FNORD-L? Glow Ball
alert indeed. Do you need a diagram? Let not your left tentacle know whatthe
Hand may be doing. You'll be happier that way and the Hand will certainly be
pleased that you haven't an inkling or even an inklette of the real signifi-
cance of numerous contemporary world events and their meaning for the schmoin
the street. Or the man in the moon, for that matter. It makes it easierthat
way. A few hints may be in order, though, for those of you who have thus far
eluded the electrode doohickey men. What is singularly significant about the
years 1875, 1913, and 1977? What is the secret agenda of the NewUniversalist
Order and why does the PTA remain silent about this? Why IS a raven like a
writing desk? Do you know where your children are? If you ARE children, do
you know where YOU are? Who really killed Milton Slimpkey? Are YOU thepatsy?
Do you like the smell of black metal? Does Neo-Science offer anything not
easily obtainable at any 7-11? What's the connnection there, anyways, and
what are you personally prepared to do about it? Do you like the smell offish?
Do you think something "fishy" is going on? Do you like to fish? Do you ever
wish you had fins, like that nice couple down the street? Would yourecognize
gangrene if you saw it? Do you feel lucky, punk? Why do you do what you doto
me? Do you believe in magic? Who holds the mortgage on YOU? Have you beenkeep-
ing up your payments? Why do I refuse to use paragraphs? Who is Granny andwhat
is her terrible secret? Do you feel lucky, cypherpunk? Do groups of peopleever
meet in secret to further their own interest, or is this mere delusion? Why?
Who wrote the book of WUV? Who is Dan Foss and why doesn't he say terrible
things about me? Are you officially sanctioned? Have you been sanitized formy
protection, or is it to protect someone else? Who do I mean by YOU anyway?
Have you read the FAQ for this list, yet? Do you, after reading many postson
this list, feel an overwhelming urge to shower? Do you know where yourfuture
is? Do you feel guardedly pessimistic? Who'll stop the rain? Is this a good
thing? Do you ever use big words without being quite sure of just what they
mean? Does Bambi like it that way? Are many of the questions here simply
rhetorical? Is there such a thing as a stupid question? Is there an answer?
Is it stupid? Are you sure? Will I ever tire of asking pointless questions?
Will I suddenly decide I've got something else to do and just stop in themid-
=========================================================================
Date: Thu, 20 Jan 1994 19:02:36 EST
Sender: New Ways of Thinking List <FNORD-L@UBVM.BITNET>
From: typo <TIPPY>
Subject: The ties that blind
Yow! Strap on those fins! The BIG GUY gwina come down from hebbin and put
all of us no-thinkers in the hot place. It's stink or swim from here on out.
Shadows and a trip to the optometrist's. Oh boy! Maybe we'll get suckers
or maybe we'll just get suckered. The past's just not what it used to be,
y'know. History and all that. Man, it's like old home day (almost). Yea,
TV shows shall inspire moral turpitude in the hearts of men and there shall
be headaches and rumors of headaches and all will not be well. AND, lest we
forget, the DEAD shall walk again (nothin' new there, boyo) and there shall
be much watching of COPS and RESCUE 911 and much posting to FNORD-L for this
is the great END TIME spoken of in hushed whispers and, yea, there shall be
bullshit up to a horse's collarbone. Ye shall find that thy sky cleaninghast
been postponed and, verily, wroth shalt thou exceedingly wax. It's the spec-
tacle I've been waiting for and in your heart you know I'm right.If atentacle
offend thee, lop it off, I say to no one in particular but someone who's
peculiar for 'tis easier to placate the finny one than wiser to be spokenof,
yea, yea, it is so. Sin o' fin, sin, and sin ag'in. And finny's son, the son
o' fin, shall have the last laugh, but not, however, the best seat. No, dear
friends, that seat shall be reserved for the least of us. HE shall have the
beast seat in the house and there shall be much gnashing of teeth and, lo,the
virgins shall reap much tears and the Great Tower shall fall over and over,
world over end, and men shall ask, what of thy paragraphs, o' sage prophet?
but I sayeth unto thee, what gaineth a man to indent when his very lunch may
launch and be lost, like FIN's beauteous rainbow, a reminder that one should
avoid making the beast that is a blender with two backs, yea, let it be
written. Go thou forth, therefore, and maketh much hoopla and gurgling and
forget ye not the Hand that is thy FRIEND, like a glove, and rejoice thereof
for thou are doomed, yea, even d-double-doomed, and givest thou not a whit
therefore. Can I get an AMEN?
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