========================================================================
Date: Tue, 1 Dec 1992 16:59:48 EST
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: HAG
Subject: Re: Piling on
In-Reply-To: Message of Mon, 30 Nov 1992 16:29:57 EST from <LIBWCA>
>>Stony Brook is not a place for harsh words anymore. No morespleens,
>>milkshake additives, or hurling of excrement. No more waiving bones
>>in the air, or showing bunt. SBRHYM-L is the Stony Brook RomanceDept.
>>nowadays, with little disembodied Valentine hearts, babies,wholesome
Here ya go fellas. Masticate on this toothsome morsel for a bit of a
charge. Picture this......a young idealistic but unfortunately frumpy
freshman writing unsent letters to her beloved English professor......
It has been three months since last we met and then only briefly, so that I
find myself missing you dreadfully. I can conjure up your face in my mind
and almost hear the echo of your warm voice; it is tantalizing and
punishing at the same time, an ever-sought exquisite torture. I have often
resolved to ride out to the village to see you, or to try to find you, but
that would surely be folly, for what would I do if I did see you? I would
probably just simper and act the perfect little foolish blithering idiot.
That is what usually happens when I see you.
The women who follow you around always speak so fluently and at length about
themselves, and so I see, do I in this note. However, I can assure you that
that is one fault that could easily and happily be rectified. Given the
opportunity and the means I would seek out those indicators of your
character, your goodness, your creativity, your depth of soul, your caring
and generous nature. I would explore these and revel in them. I would give
back to you such brilliant and scintillating pictures of your wonder. Iwould
praise you in such glowing terms as would surely make you quite vain, if it
were not ridiculous to suppose that such a thing were possible, that one
such as you could ever be seduced by vanity.
Would you wish to hear such praises or would your natural modesty preclude
such excessive behavior on my part as unwanted and unnecessary?
Would you prefer rational discourse to opulent praise? Whatever subjects are
of interest to you would find in me a thorough and avid student. I would
learn not only to speak that I might agree with you but also try to
challenge your knowledge so that together we might more deeply seek the
intricacies and depths of these subjects.
If it could only be possible, I would also try to administer to yourcomfort,
not only in menial tasks but also in special surprises and warm comforts.
Your happiness and contentment would be my primary goal. I would do all that
is in my power to shield you from boredom, discontent, unhappiness and
sorrow. If you were lonely I would be there to be a companion for you; if
you wished to be alone I would quickly and without complaint leave you to
your inner self; if you were sad I would endeavor to cheer you, and I
would strive to sooth away those irritating ripples of stress that so often
threaten to overcome us in these days of ubiquitous petty aggravations. All
of these things and more would I gladly do for you because of the love I
bear you, because it is should be your gift, your just reward to be so
served and so loved.
As you shall never know me, as these things shall never be, so shall I ever
still remain your faithful admirer, willing servant, and silent yet ever-
adoring and loving.........FRIEND.
--------------------
Whew! And you guys think it's easier to write that stuff than your usual
ratshitfuckspleendriedlivershriveledmember stuff?
> Valentine, be miiiiiii-iiiiine!"
Anytime Cuddly Cuthie, anytime.
Hark, Tegan calls. I must go.........HAG
========================================================================
Date: Tue, 1 Dec 1992 22:07:39 GMT
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: Ted Hanss <ted@ >
Subject: Automatic signature machine?
An executive at the University has carpal tunnel and can't sign the
thousands of letters he sends out each year. He'd like a machine
that would sign his name for him----something authentic looking,
not a rubber stamp but a machine that would actually use a pen or
pen-like instrument. Any leads?
--
========================================================================
Date: Wed, 2 Dec 1992 12:29:00 -0500
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: GR4302
Subject: node for nudie
a node for nudie
not a night watch
a hit is not a slap
when doubles up in your head
my bed, alas,
is lost memories
and a lark
the queen of spades
laughing at my eyes
ridden out on a rail
too much sorrow
too much energy
lost on tomorrow
========================================================================
Date: Wed, 2 Dec 1992 15:39:06 EST
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: LIBWCA
Subject: Re: Piling on
In-Reply-To: Message of Tue, 1 Dec 1992 16:59:48 EST from <HAG>
On Tue, 1 Dec 1992 16:59:48 EST <HAG> said:
>
>
>> Valentine, be miiiiiii-iiiiine!"
>
>Anytime Cuddly Cuthie, anytime.
>
>
>Hark, Tegan calls. I must go.........HAG
Aww, HAG- there I was all set to flame ya fer buynig into LIBALP's
delusionary spouting, then ya go and say something like that...
Shucks.
Best to the rugrat,
Cuthbert
========================================================================
Date: Wed, 2 Dec 1992 15:43:39 EST
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: General Mills <LIBALP>
Subject: Any leads?
An executive at the University has carpal tunnel and can't sign the
thousands of letters he sends out each year. He'd like a machine
that would sign his name for him----something authentic looking,
not a rubber stamp but a machine that would actually use a pen or
pen-like instrument. Any leads?
An executive at the University has a pen-like instrument. He'd like a
machine not a rubber stamp but a machine that would actually use a pen or
a machine----something authentic looking, but a machine. Pen-like
instrument can't sign his name for him---- but a machine!
University has carpal tunnel that would actually use an executive----
something authentic looking, not a machine, but an executive.
An executive would rubber stamp thousands of letters.
That would sign something authentic looking for him each year, but
a machine would actually use an executive.
========================================================================
Date: Thu, 3 Dec 1992 17:55:05 GMT
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: "Robert F. Casey" <rfc@ >
Subject: Making blinking Xmas lights vary in brightness
To make a pretty looking varying brightness Xmas light system for your tree:
Series/ Xmas light connection
!-b-string--!
!---string--! b=blinker bulb
!-b-string--!
light bulb !-b-string--!
100W !---string--!
! !_______! !
! ___________________!
! ! 5 way set with
! ! 3 blinkers
120V
Strings are part of a 5 way standard little light bulb set with blinkers.
(the ones from Taiwan, China, Korea, Hong Kong). To make the series
connection happen, wire up a 120v outlet socket in series with a light bulb
socket. Plug in the string in the socket, and 100w bulb in the lightsocket.
Another method: Wire two power outlets in series, and plug the Xmas lights
in one outlet, and a table lamp with 100W bulb in the other outlet.
The Xmas light bulbs will have something like 75v at start; they will be
dimmer than usual, but plenty bright enough. And will last
much longer. When the blinkers warm up, the center point voltage will vary,
and the brightness of the strings still on will vary and get brighter. This
variation will take on a random pattern, as the various blinkers kick in.
You probably will want to try different wattages of light bulbs, but for
the Xmas light sets I got, 100w worked best. Also, removing 2 of the 5
blinkers helped generate the varying brightness display better than if all
5 are in circuit.
A 100W bulb works better than a power resister. Also cheaper, and easier
to wire here. Light bulbs are nonlinear resistors, as you send more
current thru 'em, they get hotter (brighter) and their resistance goes up.
(measure the resistance of a 100w bulb not powered, and you'll see something
like 15 ohms, lot lower than 144 ohms it is under power). This nonlinearity
balances with that of the Xmas lights (they are all light bulbs!).
Where to put the 100w bulb (if not the table lamp): maybe in a light-upSanta.
Diagrams:
socket socket
v v
r--! !--bulb--
\ \________
\_____________________ 120v plug to powerline
alternate method:
to xmas lites
v
socket socket to a table lamp with 100W bulb
v v
r--! !---! !--
\ \________
\_____________________ 120v plug to powerline
Be sure to wire up things in a safe method!
And label the sockets as for use, so someone doesn't try to use it
as a normal power extension cord by mistake.
========================================================================
Date: Fri, 4 Dec 1992 04:52:36 CST
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: "Darling." <WIB@ROCIOUS.BITNET>
Subject: Blinking Xmas Lights
To this we are reduced. That sound you hear in the distance,
the seismic scream, the blanket-scrape of a toss, and, as these
things come in pairs, a turn, the gentle breaking of faith and
of bones, the tap-drip of lachrymal leakage, the mutter of
moon-blessed raving to an orchestral kettledrumbeat, that is my
overwrought mourning for this list, mired, despite the best
attempts of Bill, Arthur, Hope, Dana, GR4302, may the comets
bypass their sturdy souls, in this Evil Civility. Pass the
strychnine, dear, it's all too much.
========================================================================
Date: Fri, 4 Dec 1992 09:23:00 -06
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: Merciful Lee Dickens <DICKENS>
Subject: I'MOAN BURNYER BUNKERDOWN
Stay thy hands, Varlots!
Everybody FREEZE!!!!
Okay, let's just be Real Calm for a minute here. Gerber, slowwwwwwly
reach down and ever-so-gently unplug that extension cord while Arthur
and Bill and I (and however many else of us it takes) unscrew that
lightbulb....
Whew.
That was CLOSE!
Good thing I'm allergic to tungsten - that slaphappy sonofabitch was
giving us directions for self-immolation, folks! If we had followed
those Christmas light directions of his we'd've been finding our
stockings over the mantelpiece of eternal Hellfire! Yea, verily.
Where'd he go? That Robert guy. Let's get him and find out who put
him up to this. It was those bullies over at the Fnord, I'll bet!
Let's hang him like a decoration!
Quickly Losing The Christmas Spirit,
Merciful Lee Dickens
========================================================================
Date: Fri, 4 Dec 1992 11:00:00 EST
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
Comments: No poem for today. This is a substitute, chosen at random.
From: Bialik Poetry Server <BIALIK@BRANDEIS.BITNET>
Subject: Poem number 860806
Postscriptum
Joseph Brodsky (translated by George L. Kline)
How sad that my life has not come to mean
for you what your life came to mean for me.
... How many times in vacant lots have I
consigned my copper coin, crowned with the seal
of state, to that webbed universe of wires,
attempting hopelessly to stretch the time
of our connectedness... Alas, unless
a man can manage to eclipse the world,
he's left to twirl a gap-toothed dial in some
phone booth, as one might spin a ouija board,
until a phantom answers, echoing
the last wails of a buzzer in the night.
========================================================================
Date: Fri, 4 Dec 1992 23:03:10 EST
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: LIBWCA
Subject: THE CIVILITY OF EVIL
Well, it's your fault, anyway, damn you. You succored him and
cleared the path for him and even nursed him back to health
when he went through that pathetic self-inflicted flesh wound
phase. You couldn't have seen this coming? You couldn't have
warned us?
And now that he's gone entirely round the twist, where are you?
Off traipsing through the goddamned ALPS? Couldn't you have at
least picked a more obscure and esoteric mountain range? The
Urals, perhaps?
At any rate, you have to stop him? You know what he wants now,
don't you? HE WANTS DAN BOYD BACK! It's all just to loathsome
to contemplate.
Cuthbert
========================================================================
Date: Fri, 4 Dec 1992 23:12:00 EST
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: Claims and Litigation <LIBEMU >
Subject: NOTICE OF COPYWRITE
Please note- the use of seven consecutive questions, either in
otherwise protected material or in Fair Use quotations under
section 6, clause 3.2 of the Standard Code, is a trademark of
LIBEMU Conspiracies, Ltd. Any infringement will be dealt with
as harshly as possible considering the current deplition in the
ferret population, but don't let that fool you because we also
have lawyers.
Magister Ludi
Claims and Litigation Dept.
LCL
========================================================================
Date: Mon, 7 Dec 1992 05:01:58 -0500
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: GR4302
Subject: zed zed
goobliobgin hobgoblin and may
went down to the river to play
but metty's barge was a hefty charge
so they stole in the night away
as they floated
one was quoted to say:
"today will be finer
"than a cruise on a liner
"if wily's wind whistle's our way"
thus through the currents
they rode the torrents
on their backs
lying on their rucksacks
out of their boxes and free for a day
amen.
;^##
========================================================================
Date: Mon, 7 Dec 1992 11:49:30 EST
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: LIBWCA
Subject: ANNETTE! CUBBY!
MOUSEKETEER ROLL CALL! SOUND OFF NOW!
========================================================================
Date: Mon, 7 Dec 1992 15:10:00 -06
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: Merciful Lee Dickens <DICKENS>
Subject: Reply to ANNETTE! CUBBY!
>
MOUSEKETEER ROLL CALL! SOUND OFF NOW!
****************************************************03:09pm:
RUHOLLAH!
========================================================================
Date: Tue, 8 Dec 1992 11:41:58 EST
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: LIBWCA
Subject: Re: I'MOAN BURNYER BUNKERDOWN
In-Reply-To: Message of Fri,
4 Dec 1992 09:23:00 -06 from <DICKENS>
On Fri, 4 Dec 1992 09:23:00 -06 Merciful Lee Dickens said:
>Stay thy hands, Varlots!
>Everybody FREEZE!!!!
>Okay, let's just be Real Calm for a minute here. Gerber, slowwwwwwly
>reach down and ever-so-gently unplug that extension cord while Arthur
>and Bill and I (and however many else of us it takes) unscrew that
>lightbulb....
>Whew.
>That was CLOSE!
>Good thing I'm allergic to tungsten - that slaphappy sonofabitch was
>giving us directions for self-immolation, folks! If we had followed
>those Christmas light directions of his we'd've been finding our
>stockings over the mantelpiece of eternal Hellfire! Yea, verily.
>Where'd he go? That Robert guy. Let's get him and find out who put
>him up to this. It was those bullies over at the Fnord, I'll bet!
>Let's hang him like a decoration!
>
>Quickly Losing The Christmas Spirit,
>Merciful Lee Dickens
I think we all know who it was. He's past the point where there's
any sense talking to him. The only thing we can do now is jump
him while he ain't looking, hog-tie him, throw him in a hole and
pump the occasional bagel down there, so he can live the rest of
his life quietly and in extreme pain.
Or we could shoot him in the street like a rabid weasel.
Cuthbert
========================================================================
Date: Wed, 9 Dec 1992 09:45:00 -06
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: Merciful Lee Dickens <DICKENS>
Subject: Reply to Re: Reply to Re: Rep
>
Cube--
Perry Mason is a great theme, but nothing does it for me like the theme from
Peter Gunn
One foot in the sixties,
Hiram
*** Comments from FELONIOUS J. CUBENSIS:
Oh man!
That goes without saying!
You know, while we're on the subject of television, allow me to vent my
spleen on this little section of carpet for a minute and get out of my
system one of my longtime sources of teeth-gnashing vexation - the tv
commercial that happens to suck the worst at any given time.
Today I'm targetting that series of hideous K-Mart ads that think that
they're oh-so-very clever with all the busy little shoppers delivering
their oh-so-witty one-liners and insidious repartees while praising
K-Mart for making their miserable fucking pathetic lives so much
easier to bear. I GOTTA call bullshit on that. I have to SCREAM IT!
In the first place, where the hell is this mythical K-mart? I am
frequently confounded into entering them and I have NEVER seen shoppers
that even remotely resemble these contemptible androids being foisted
off on us! Who are these people? What is this shit?
Why don't they tell it like it is? Why not show the true picture of
what it's like in those God-forsaken hellholes?
Show the entire inbred hillbilly clientele, openly picking their noses,
talking aloud to themselves, slapping the living shit out of their
trailing brood of drooling imbecile children, yelling out in Tongues in
preparation for some Rapture to which no God in her right mind would
ever dream of summoning them.
Show the surly-assed mongrel bitch running the cash register. Zoom in
on that giant wad of gum she's chewing that rivals the size of the
goiter on her hairy neck as she yells across five aisles of impatient
customers that have been standing in line since the Great Depression,
"Beulah-Mae! How much on these Mickeymouse flip-flops?!".
Why doesn't any of that all-pervading atmosphere of impending doom -
like a hungry vulture that is circling overhead, waiting to pounce -
filter through these sanitized vignettes of charm school Americana?
Why doesn't that creeping sensation of dread - like a knife fight's
unmistakable smell of blood - waft in from that celluloid periphery?
I hate you, K-Mart, and your foul Purgatorical effluvuium that assails
my weary brain as it attempts to screen out the extraneous signals that
incessantly bombard me with a steady influx of useless banal prosaic
crap that goad me closer, ever closer, to your gun department.
Attention K-Mart Shoplifters:
Run screaming to the nearest exit and get a life!
This is not a test, we repeat, this is not a test.
We now rejoin the program which is already in progress.
Cube
========================================================================
Date: Wed, 9 Dec 1992 13:54:00 -06
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: Merciful Lee Dickens <DICKENS>
Subject: we know yer in there
we can hear you whimpering...
What are they doing to you in there?
Why have you forsaken us?
Look at me when I'm talking to you!
Stop fidgetting all the time!
Why can't you be more like your cousin Winnipeg? He's such a nice boy!
Is this your mess?
Who did you think was going to clean it up - the Easter Bunny?
Oh, that's right: start to cry, you big baby.
Why you-- I oughta--
GET BACK HERE THIS INSTANT!
SASKATCHEWAN! SASKATCHEWAN!
========================================================================
Date: Thu, 10 Dec 1992 11:59:18 -0500
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: GR4302
You could've all been beavers!
========================================================================
Date: Thu, 10 Dec 1992 12:04:55 EST
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: LIBWCA
In-Reply-To: Message of Thu, 10 Dec 1992 11:59:18 -0500 from <GR4302>
On Thu, 10 Dec 1992 11:59:18 -0500 <GR4302> said:
>You could've all been beavers!
No, I could have been a pair of ragged claws. You could have been
a beaver, but you didn't have the teeth for it. Dana could have
been a contender. Arthur could have been the shooter on the
grassy knoll, but turned it down for a walk on in "Cats". H.
could have been R. The various cheatings could have been Keebler
Elves, but were sent down from the acaedemy after that embarassing
alligator clip incident. Foss could have been, but wasn't.
Cuthbert
========================================================================
Date: Thu, 10 Dec 1992 11:21:59 CST
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: LIBWCA
Subject: could've and should've
And I, I could have been (deep breath) the honied scales of human delight
... only they wouldn't let me.
========================================================================
Date: Thu, 10 Dec 1992 12:53:27 EST
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: General Mills <LIBALP>
Subject: COULDA COULDA COULDA
I could have been the golden-haired, blue-eyed stormtroopin'
neurosurgeon my mother always dreamed of having; but I chose,
instead, a career in lumbago. The shame.
GM
========================================================================
Date: Thu, 10 Dec 1992 19:09:59 GMT
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: queue cue <cheating@CCVM.SUNYSB.EDU>
I could have been a 7(seven)-course meal, complete with all the trimmings,
but instead I'm but a last recourse.
========================================================================
Date: Thu, 10 Dec 1992 19:23:27 GMT
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: queue cue <cheating@CCVM.SUNYSB.EDU>
Subject: my melancholy melangel (ragtime-to-riches gal)
Guardant and on pain killers, live and lacking the overdubs which are reserved for remixes and morsels of sound, stew[heart]ing in their own juices, spiled from their copious and mellifluid mendicancions of its applied misology, it's time, I would stern, to deodorize and freshen the causistry strains: I closed the bunker a long time ago. I don't know where you people are playing, but it sure isn't my house. Stranded and without cavernous priaptitude, I've been slumming. She hasn't even called to request a gearing up of Winter's Sleight Hand for underwritten and underhand purposes, so I've gone a-pursuant (a lie for claimants of mother-of-pearl inset heraldry insignias which have been buttonhooked and then detached: I'd surrender shelves of sheaves of gentry genealogy for the chance at a knee-bend from her. But you kids are welcome to wreck that place if you want; just be wary of the health and fire codes. m
========================================================================
Date: Thu, 10 Dec 1992 16:56:57 EST
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: LIBWCA
Subject: I'M SO WILD ABOUT HARRY BUMSTEAD
Y'see, Cheating, it's like this: whether this was yer
sorry dump or not, after some work, some paint to cover
the bloodstains, it's turned into a pretty damn nice
place. I've taken to it, in fact. Sure, we had to call in
Bruno- the gimpy munitions expert with the heart of gold and
three teeth to match- to tear down that one wing with that
goddammed awful stink that no one could stend to go near, and
it looks like he's gonna recover nicely. So while you've been
making daisy wheels and trying to get Boyd back, we've
got ourselves a little club. Gonna have a grand opening, too,
son, real soon. Plenty of cheerleaders servin' drinks, too.
Watch fer it. Bigger than Little Five Points. And ya know what?
We're not gonna let yer sorry wrinkled ass in here, boy. We'll
be carousing long into the starry night while you'll be stuck out in
a field of rotting sunflowers which with any luck 'll screw up
yer allergies something fierce.
Me, I'm gonna go sit in the Heavy Machinery Room with
Blondie and Dagwood and Mr. Withers too and we'll pass around
a bottle of Jack D and shoot the shit about the good
ol' days. Now, if you'd stuck around and auditioned
fer the part of Billy Libalp- naahh, never mind, you ain't
got the gams.
Cuthbert
LIBWCA
========================================================================
Date: Thu, 10 Dec 1992 16:15:00 -06
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: Merciful Lee Dickens <DICKENS>
Subject: HOLIDAY LUNCHEON
I am looking forward to seeing all of you at the annual holiday
luncheon next Thursday, the 17th. We have been steadily receiving your
lists of food items and $2.00 donations since the first memo went out.
For those of you who expect to be released in time for the luncheon but
have not yet contributed your $2.00, please try to do so by Friday,
10:00 a.m. The $2.00 we are collecting from all those attending is
being used to buy the possum and to defray costs for the cage, cornmeal
and bucket.
One reminder to all who regularly use the bunker kitchen: The Inner
Circle of Exalted Members is requesting that all items be removed from
the icebox by 3:30 Wednesday, December 16th. We need all available ice
box and root cellar space on the day of the holiday dinner for food
storage and preparation. I know that this is an inconvenience to some
of you worthless douche bags without the faintest shred of festive
spirit; however, please help us on this special occasion--it's only for
one day, once a year.
Would the person(s) responsible for borrowing the dipper last week
please put it back on its hook by the water barrel. We really can't
afford to keep replacing these.
Thank You So Much
You've Been A Great Audience
Good Night
Demetrius the Dead Lobster, Chairentity
Stony Brook Illiterary Underground Holiday Luncheon Committee
========================================================================
Date: Thu, 10 Dec 1992 18:29:44 EST
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: LIBWCA
Subject: Re: I'M SO WILD ABOUT HARRY BUMSTEAD
In-Reply-To: Message of Thu, 10 Dec 1992 16:56:57 EST from <LIBWCA>
On Thu, 10 Dec 1992 16:56:57 EST <LIBWCA> said:
>Y'see, Cheating, it's like this: whether this was yer
>sorry dump or not, after some work, some paint to cover
>the bloodstains, it's turned into a pretty damn nice
>place. I've taken to it, in fact. Sure, we had to call in
>Bruno- the gimpy munitions expert with the heart of gold and
>three teeth to match- to tear down that one wing with that
>goddammed awful stink that no one could stend to go near, and
>it looks like he's gonna recover nicely. So while you've been
>making daisy wheels and trying to get Boyd back, we've
>got ourselves a little club. Gonna have a grand opening, too,
>son, real soon. Plenty of cheerleaders servin' drinks, too.
>Watch fer it. Bigger than Little Five Points. And ya know what?
>We're not gonna let yer sorry wrinkled ass in here, boy. We'll
>be carousing long into the starry night while you'll be stuck out in
>a field of rotting sunflowers which with any luck 'll screw up
>yer allergies something fierce.
>
>Me, I'm gonna go sit in the Heavy Machinery Room with
>Blondie and Dagwood and Mr. Withers too and we'll pass around
>a bottle of Jack D and shoot the shit about the good
>ol' days. Now, if you'd stuck around and auditioned
>fer the part of Billy Libalp- naahh, never mind, you ain't
>got the gams.
>Cuthbert
>LIBWCA
Ha ha ha- I'm so damn funny I don't believe it.
Cuthbert's Other Personality.
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