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========================================================================
Date: Thu, 1 Oct 1992 10:20:05 EDT
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: "(Robert Holder)" <WHIPLASH>
Subject: The People Who Had to Take the Bus
The people who had to take the bus finally decided that they
had had enough of route changes, schedule changes, transfers
and shitty bus drivers with their obnoxious inbred mutant
wart covered faces.
FIRST, they forced the drivers, at gunpoint, to pull over
between stops! They boarded without exact change and made
the drivers give them refunds for the difference with their
personal money! They lost their transfers, and boarded anyways
and they got in the drivers' faces saying, "So what are ya gonna
DO about it, huh? heh heh heh" and if the driver gave them any
lip, they forced him to stand on a live bouncing betty at an
uncovered bench in the pouring rain while being slapped about
the face, ears and groin with used-chewing-gum-covered tennis
shoes.
They hotwired the busses and stood, and shouted, and smoked in
them and they tied the hoods who sit in the back seats to the
bumper and dragged 'em a few blocks.
THEN they commenced to burning all the buses, driving them
off of bridges, rolling them in heavy traffic, and the like.
They commandeered fire trucks and hosed water into passing
car windows near all the corners where the big puddles gather
after a storm, and then they cut down all the traffic lights
with chain saws.
They got on the phones, called the emergency operators, reported
accidents, looting, flooding, riots, pickets, protests and
people chaining themselves to fences, buildings, vehicles,
smokestacks, each other and every other goddamned thing. They
came out in force. They flooded the market with cheap bonds
and they cordoned off the area. They broadcast paid political
announcements, showed their 1-800 number and set up a perimeter.
They trounced the opposition, filed all the right forms, got all
the sneakiest lawyers, ate their Wheaties and they beat the tar
outta those heathen A-rabs. Again.
They ruled America with an iron fist, those people who had to
take the bus. It was the golden age of the pedestrian hero.
They made us all see it their way, and they straightened things
out. This November, VOTE for the people who had to take the bus!
========================================================================
Date: Thu, 1 Oct 1992 14:05:00 EDT
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: JBURKE1
Subject: Bubber Rands
What to do with the rubber band I found on my desk?
I could shoot it at the granola person next to me...
I could hold together a bunch of loose odds and ends that are
in drastic need of being held together...
I could piece together a balsa wood airplane that runs on rubber band
power....
I could melt it down and mold it into little rubber balls that I can patent
and sell to small childern who would shove them into their noses, ears and
other assorted orifices....
I could cut it so it would be a rubber strip....
I could tie it around my genitalia as some form of self expression.....
I could send it to South Africa....
I could dance with it..
I could make love to it...
I could write a long list about it.
What would you do?
Hoagie
========================================================================
Date: Thu, 1 Oct 1992 14:34:09 EDT
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: "(Robert Holder)" <WHIPLASH>
Subject: American Bus Drivers I Have Known
Hello friends. I'm here to talk about that great class of
Americans, the Bus Drivers.
Now don't let this sappy music or the flag waving behind me
get you all worked up an weepy. Instead, let my words stir
your patriotic souls.
The Bus Drivers, Friends, are The Backbone of this Great
Nation. They were there at Jamestown, and they'll be there
when we terraform Mars, because that's what The Bus Drivers
are about: overblown, expensive projects where we all get to
go kill somebody or blow somethin' up! Just good folks. Like
you an' me!
I remember when my daddy fought in the big war (as Mojo used
to say); he got his legs blowed off. And if it weren't for
The Bus Drivers, he'd be floppin around on the floor night
an' day. Now, I know some people in this country like a good
flop now and then, but let me tell you how it is where I live:
not around here you don't. We have got Zero Tolerance for
floppin'. This is your Driver. This is your Driver on a Bus.
Any questions?
Let's put Bus Driving Back in School where it belongs. It's
an American tradition, and it'll do the kids some good! Give
'em some exercise. Ever tried to run away from a bus as it
bears down on you in a narrow hallway? Believe me, it keeps
you fit! We had Bus Driving in school every mornin' before
class when I was a kid. If it's good enough for Bus Drivers
it's good enough for me!
We're gonna make an amendment to the Constitution making it
a federal offense to burn a Bus. And we're also going to go
around shooting all those people who are thinking thoughts
which are on our Bad Thoughts List. And those folks out there
who think they can get by without pulling their weight? Pow!
All those people who Aren't Like Us; they're dead, baby,
they're history. Stay with us! Stick around! Catch the show.
There's a growing feeling in America of more group Bus Driver
Togetherness. We believe every Bus Driver has a Right to Drive.
There have been rumors that we may allow Bus Drivers to be
gutted like pigs during the first trimester. Not so! We are
Pro-Bus and we're gonna stay Pro-Bus! We believe that Family
Values are best served on a Bus and that's why we need The Bus
Drivers.
We believe that The Bus Drivers can work best with College
Tax Credits of up to $27.43 which they can use to make a down
payment on a piece of cat puke or maybe a used hanky. And we
have shown that America needs a strong Military Bus Fleet. My
fellow Americans, the Route War is over, and We Won. Let's all
gloat about it for a moment. Ahhhh.
And Speaking of Tax credits, I just have one thing to say to all
those Cab Drivers in Congress: Read My Lips, No New Fare Increases!
Friends, we are standing on the brink of the greatest commute
mankind has ever known. I hope you'll join us in our New Bus Order
and VOTE Bus Drivers for November!
========================================================================
Date: Thu, 1 Oct 1992 13:42:00 -05
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: Merciful Lee Dickens < DICKENS>
Subject: Reply to Bubber Rands
>
What to do with the rubber band I found on my desk?
I could shoot it at the granola person next to me...
I could hold together a bunch of loose odds and ends that are
in drastic need of being held together...
I could piece together a balsa wood airplane that runs on rubber band
power....
I could melt it down and mold it into little rubber balls that I can patent
and sell to small childern who would shove them into their noses, ears and
other assorted orifices....
I could cut it so it would be a rubber strip....
I could tie it around my genitalia as some form of self expression.....
I could send it to South Africa....
I could dance with it..
I could make love to it...
I could write a long list about it.
What would you do?
Hoagie
*** Comments from INSPECTOR #5 :
If I were you, I am quite certain I would make love to it, but I would
do it in such a crafty way that, should someone unexpectedly round the
corner and catch me in the act, I could quickly make it look as though
I was but merely tying it around my genitals in some form of self-
expression.
Merciful
========================================================================
Date: Thu, 1 Oct 1992 13:48:00 -05
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: Merciful Lee Dickens <DICKENS>
Subject: PRO BUS
Hello dear friends. I'm here to talk about that great class of
Americans, the Bus Drivers.
Now don't let this sappy music or the flag waving behind me
get you all worked up and weepy. Instead, let my words stir
your patriotic souls.
The Bus Drivers, Friends, are The Backbone of this Great
Nation. They were there at Jamestown, and they'll be there
when we terraform Mars, because that's what The Bus Drivers
are about: overblown, expensive projects where we all get to
go kill somebody or blow somethin' up! Just good folks. Like
you an' me!
I remember when my daddy fought in the big war (as Mojo used
to say); he got his legs blowed off. And if it weren't for
The Bus Drivers, he'd be floppin around on the floor night
an' day. Now, I know some people in this country like a good
flop now and then, but let me tell you how it is where I live:
not around here you don't. We have got Zero Tolerance for
floppin'. This is your Driver. This is your Driver on a Bus.
Any questions?
Let's put Bus Driving Back in School where it belongs. It's
an American tradition, and it'll do the kids some good! Give
'em some exercise. Ever tried to run away from a bus as it
bears down on you in a narrow hallway? Believe me, it keeps
you fit! We had Bus Driving in school every mornin' before
class when I was a kid. If it's good enough for Bus Drivers
it's good enough for me!
We're gonna make an amendment to the Constitution making it
a federal offense to burn a Bus. And we're also going to go
around shooting all those people who are thinking thoughts
which are on our Bad Thoughts List. And those folks out there
who think they can get by without pulling their weight? Pow!
All those people who Aren't Like Us; they're dead, baby,
they're history. Stay with us! Stick around! Catch the show.
There's a growing feeling in America of more group Bus Driver
Togetherness. We believe every Bus Driver has a Right to Drive.
There have been rumors that we may allow Bus Drivers to be
gutted like pigs during the first trimester. Not so! We are
Pro-Bus and we're gonna stay Pro-Bus! We believe that Family
Values are best served on a Bus and that's why we need The Bus
Drivers.
We believe that The Bus Drivers can work best with College
Tax Credits of up to $27.43 which they can use to make a down
payment on a piece of cat puke or maybe a used hanky. And we
have shown that America needs a strong Military Bus Fleet. My
fellow Americans, the Route War is over, and We Won. Let's all
gloat about it for a moment. Ahhhh.
And Speaking of Tax credits, I just have one thing to say to all
those Cab Drivers in Congress: Read My Lips, No New Fare Increases!
Friends, we are standing on the brink of the greatest commute
mankind has ever known. I hope you'll join us in our New Bus Order
and VOTE Bus Drivers for November!
You've Been A Great Audience!
Thank You And Good Night!
Merciful Lee Dickens
========================================================================
Date: Thu, 1 Oct 1992 23:16:23 CST
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: GR4302
Subject: he steps on the clutch and the toilet goes flu-ush--
people: hey. who's that crazy busdriver sittin' in that crazy
busdriver busdriver's seat????
***********
WARNING!!! You may be a City Slicker if:
1) You know the difference between a taxi and a cab.
2) You went to a public school named after a gangster or policeman.
3) Your dick's on backwards.
4) You got your head up your ass.
5) You'd starve if the diners all closed.
6) Can't tell powdered eggs from dumplings.
7) You hate most everybody.
8) You call your mother by her stage name.
========================================================================
Date: Tue, 6 Oct 1992 09:35:20 EDT
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: "(Robert Holder)" <WHIPLASH>
Subject: high speed screws in the water
bearing one one five range two thousand yards
blow ballast blow safety blow negative
when you hear the tone in your right ear
raise your right hand
when you hear the tone in your left ear
raise your left hand
when you hear the tone in your head
raise the syringe to your jugular vein
insert the needle and depress the plunger
extract, rinse and repeat
please notice that the captain has
extinguished the smoking lamp, reading lights
and engines
you are not to sleep, smoke or talk
there will be no questions
until the exit light is turned on
please fasten your seat belt
and put your tray table
in the upright position
raise your hand
and wait until your name is called
you have five days to file a petition
with the clerk of the circuit court
if you have not filed your petition
within five days
a warrant will be issued for your arrest
any noncompliance with instructions
issued to you by the arresting officer
will be interpreted as resisting arrest
if you resist arrest your arresting
officer has been instructed to shoot you
repeatedly about the face and torso
now
put your hands on your head and interlock
your fingers drop to your knees
drop to the ground
this letter is a notice of collection
our agency has been contacted by citibank
visa regarding the unpaid balance on your
account in the amount of $17.42
if this balance is not paid
within seven days
a report of non-payment of loan will
be entered in your credit record
steps will be taken to initiate the
collection process
and the matter will be turned over to
local authorities
this conversation is being recorded
please watch your head
and hold the handrail
this fuse is rated 70A slowblow
do not use this fuse in applications of
peak RMS avalanche less than 5ms
========================================================================
Date: Tue, 6 Oct 1992 09:40:00 -05
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: Merciful Lee Dickens <DICKENS>
Subject: WHIPLASH
You know, you're really becoming quite a personality on the net.
You went from whining little slutpuppy to Serious Voice Of Stark Raving
Contention. I actually study your postings now without just scornfully
deleting them. I plan to include some of your more inspired rantings
(with your permission, naturally) in a short course I'll be teaching
next quarter, called "Dragnet - Loquacious Nancyboys in Twentieth
Century Psychobabble".
I've even started a Whiplash file here in the Central Computer that I
share with the fellows in the crime lab!
I have a feeling that you will soon have your very own fan club and
will need the services of a professional spin doctor. If you are
between the ages of 30 and 65, we urge you to get pad and pencil at
ready to respond to this wonderful seed of self-doubt and paranoia that
you will see flashing on your screen at the sound of the cattle prod.
This ad will only be shown once, and only for a split second, so please
don't bungle this like you've bungled everything else you ever tried to
do.
Remember -
We're your friends. We're not like the others.
New Improved
Merciful, Merciful Dickens
========================================================================
Date: Tue, 6 Oct 1992 11:43:00 EDT
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: JBURKE1
Subject: Post Nasal Drip
Whose trip is this anyways? Getting a thought across in this Lime Jello
medium is like pushing your finger through shit. Some of us can't seem to
help licking ourselves clean after we make the plunge. I apologize for my
rage, but rage is real and reality is something Bill Cosby doesn't talkabout
when he taunts the pudding in those stupid little bowls. Who the fuck eats
pudding anymore?
Hoagie
========================================================================
Date: Tue, 6 Oct 1992 10:56:00 -05
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: Merciful Lee Dickens <DICKENS>
Subject: TARGET PRACTICE
Hey, who said that?
It's MY trip, you twisted geek.
Somebody bring me that little punk. In return, I'll put a star by your
name and let you sleep late tomorrow.
We need to make an example of that angry young guttersnipe.
It's been awhile since we had some good target practice around here
(unless we count Bibleboy, or was that on Fnord?), so let's teach our
young K-Y cowboy the ins and outs of speaking out of turn.
New Improved
Merciful, Merciful Dickens
========================================================================
Date: Tue, 6 Oct 1992 13:25:53 EDT
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: "(Robert Holder)" <WHIPLASH>
Subject: Dirty Tricks
There was a field where this field was
a long time ago.
Little kids played here, but that was back
before it was a field.
Now it's just a field and little kids play
here, but only until it becomes a field.
At that time they will have to leave. Then
other little kids will play there, or here?
There. I don't recognize where the field is
supposed to be.
Of course, the concrete bits
and broken bottle pieces, and whole bottles
which are mostly buried and have bugs in them
and the foil and bleached stringy weathered
paper globs are all there, or here or wherever
the goddamned field is just waiting in the
dirt for those little kids to show up and
paw throught them with their egocentric grubby
fat little fingers.
But this is, of course, before the universe
was squashed excruciatingly so I could be
punished for being alive.
There is a horror that has no scale.
It just goes bigger and bigger, smaller and
smaller until it doesn't mean anything to you
anymore, it has become so differernt from
what you are that you can't understand it at
all. You just stare into it. Then you realize
that you understand the HORROR, it's YOU that
you don't understand. YOU become the thing that
has no scale, and the you which you always used
to know just floats away like the last lifeboat,
while you stand at the rail of your sinking ship
looking at the freezing water and thinking to
yourself over and over and over, "I've just got
to THINK, there must be some way! What am I
going to do?"
Good question.
========================================================================
Date: Tue, 6 Oct 1992 13:16:00 -05
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: Merciful Lee Dickens <DICKENS>
Subject: Reply to Dirty Tricks
Fart Blossom:
I'd give it about a seven.
It has a good beat and it's easy to flounder to. I thought it was kind
of sluggish at first, but it picked up toward the end.
All in all, I'd say, wait until dollar day to rent it.
You're Welcome,
New Improved
Merciful, Merciful Et Cetera
Reminding You That Mahatma Guru Sri Paramahansa Shivaji Was Just
Another Pseudonym Used By That Bloated Pusbag Aleister Crowley, So
Don't Get All Worked Up Over "Eight Lectures On Yoga", Okay? Just
Finish Your Pre-digested Pap And Get The Hell Out Of Here.
I Have Work To Do.
========================================================================
Date: Tue, 6 Oct 1992 16:42:30 EDT
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: "(Robert Holder)" <WHIPLASH>
Subject: no problem.
cya (look ma no whining)
========================================================================
Date: Wed, 7 Oct 1992 11:28:42 CST
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: GR4302
Subject: short of a line home
tired of pig ears my mind becomes a furrow for fertile disguise
let it be this, that, the other one i have no desires
that do not burst out of me in peels and pairs
of resonance, disonance, life dancing
its way across the land northward
i surrender myself and say
yes, take me in
========================================================================
Date: Wed, 7 Oct 1992 11:31:49 CST
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: GR4302
Subject: dwindling
is better than a sad sack of silent note taking in the mirror
ruby tuesday clawing at the screen door
========================================================================
Date: Wed, 7 Oct 1992 17:56:45 GMT
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: "Dktr. Subtilis (ego vamp -" <cheating@CCVM.SUNYSB.EDU>
Subject: Cease and Desist Warning
Haven't been around much since I lost m'dear in a card game down at
Sargasso Flats; been trying to win her back, but I was snookered, and
the price seems to have gone up. Anyway, so, here I am, looking in
at my beloved homestead, place where I hang my head at the end of the
day, and I find ... a charming display of irky spatting. To wit's end:
Robert: By now, you've discovered that there is no leaving; make no
bones about it, you can slip by briefly, but, as long as I pay your
salary (ha!, like I do, though I've always wanted to say that) and
as long as you're not a Senator, your lodged. In truth, I underestimated
you: so much more than mbm even with scientific calculator, I'm beginning
to see that you're not the type to be bulldozed by the regaling rules,
even if the FBI makes you suit-&-tie yrself up. Fine work: so, why
be cowered by the puce of Rollins' assortment of sight-gags? I know,
you're new around here, still getting the feel; but face facts: the
retreat from the inane is not to be harbored: think, son: what would
Kim Deal say? Y'see? Don't you feel a whole lot better now?
Rollins: In yr mitred frenzy to pope this list, may I suggest that you
try some of the "Come All Ye Faithful" and "In the Eyes of the Lord"
robes that line just inside the closet? In other words: fun's fun,
Cubey, ol' chum; now, get yrself a new feedbag and a nice new schtick
lest we're all inspired to take Danny-wide-boy-Foss' advice and turn
off the television, at least the monitors, and find ourselves instead
going for long sallies through glens and dales and even danas ...
THINK, MAN, THINK: we love you, Dana, but yr filmstriptease has been
thinning a bit: and thanks much for the Brooks poem: hit the ol' spot,
that did, as they say in comfort zones. See, y'll feel lots better,
boy, if you don't worry so much, and Remember: It Takes Fewer Muscles
To Smile Than To Frown.
There we go; all better? Mommy kiss and owwie's all gone.
Now Don't Make Me Come Back Up There Again.
You've all been a huge disappointment,
Thank You and Goodnight!
-=M=-
========================================================================
Date: Wed, 7 Oct 1992 16:01:25 EDT
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: "(Robert Holder)" <WHIPLASH>
Subject: now that we're all friendly-like
no offense pally but do you have a majority
opinion on this list? i think the netvolk
mistake my whining for hatred. fuck the world
fuck you all fuck everything. you think
that eastern religon stuff is a tidy joke? it's
a fucking nightmare. you can't seal up the Big
Black with a clever label or some pose. It *will*
eat your psyche and leave you sobbing. If you've
seen it, you *know* what i'm talking about, if
not FUCK YOU. I'm tired of wasting time.
Oh, and by the way, fuck eastern religon, all
religons are the opposite of what they say they
are.
this world is winding up into a gigantic
mechanized death grind and in the end it's
not going to matter what you said or what I said.
It's a tragedy and it can't be stopped. Humans are
by design incapable of communication. Also, they
are afflicted with an unfortunate low level hardware
flaw that causes 100% of them to hallucinate
constantly. This language is a parasite that rides
us like a tick; we serve it, not the other way around.
no communication is happening here, and the illusions
you have of understanding being transferred are just
peripheral symptoms of the language's biology.
now you're thinking i'm crazy and sophmoric and you're
right. I have no fucking idea what is going on,
who i am, what i am. i am stupid worthless asshole,
and there are no echoes on the signals i send out.
i'm a blind man in a dark room, and i don't give a
shit if there's an audience in the gallery above with
infrared goggles tittering at my spasms or writing
upscale academic papers about my afflictions.
I have no hard feelings against rollide. i admire
his style and i have said so in the past. but i also
think he is hiding behind a pose because it's easy.
i don't think he is sincere. i bet he doesn't slam
the flesh and blood people in his life the way he does
the people on the net. And so i can't sink energy into
establishing real communication with him. if i start
hearing stuff from him i can respond to (something
besides "you suck, shutup"), i'll respond. until
then i'm not going to waste my time bothering him, (or
anybody else flesh or not) and I'm not going to LET
anyone ANYONE waste my time bothering me.
you think i am full of contradictions. you're wrong.
there are things that are TRUE and FALSE at the same
time. empiricism is bullshit. rationality is bullshit.
there is no knowledge. there is no truth. AND there
IS TRUTH. THERE IS KNOWLEDGE. You think that is MY
pose? FINE. you can sit there and talk with each other
about how fucked up i am. i'm glad! do it! blast me!
that's great. but that is not where i am going. i
don't know where i'm going, but i can tell that's not it.
a few people who have something to gain by hearing me
will listen and those who don't won't. I'm not going
to force EITHER kind to listen. Those same rules apply
to me, and I am not going to listen to anything that I
don't want or need to hear.
Hard Edge is the big fashion now, isn't it? I am not
impressed with Hard Edge, because THERE *IS* SOMETHING
EVEN BIGGER, MEANER, STRONGER. I will not live *there*.
now if you still want me around here, fine. you think
i'm full of shit, beautiful. But i'm not going to spend
my time where nobody gains. i'll respond to this list
to the extent that me and the list will grow, and right
now, what do we have to gain from each other?
you think this is bullshit? well BRACE YOURSELF BABY,
BECAUSE **LIIIIIFE** IS BULLSHIT. *YOUR* LIFE IS BULLSHIT.
live in it, or hide from it; it doesn't affect me.
life is more than just "bullshit" but for my purposes here,
that is all I have to say about it. and of course, there
is the retort that life is bullshit when I'm talking, but
if anybody disagrees with me then I have all kinds of things
to say. too bad. you figure it out.
all right, now you all know how i feel. and i just want
to say one last thing; all that stuff, all that harsh
criticism, it's not about anybody ANYBODY here in particular.
That is the way i see the *world*. That is how I see
mankind. BUT I haven't LOST my HOPE. I STILL have a
TINY BIT of it left. *good luck* if you want to kill that
last little bit of my hope.
for those of you just joining in, i tried to fucking leave
this room but got pulled back in. if you don't like me
here just drop a little line to the list controller whoever
he is and say so. just get that majority vote and you win
the kewpie doll.
thanks for the encouragement cheating. that is the only
reason i didn't just set up my SIGNOFF in crontab every
hour. that's the reason everybody got this little gem of
a note. now rollide: go ahead, tell me how fucked up I
am. I'm on the edge of my seat.
robert h
========================================================================
Date: Wed, 7 Oct 1992 16:52:23 EDT
Reply-To: New Ways of Thinking List <FNORD-L@UBVM.BITNET>
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
Comments: Warning -- original Sender: tag was FNORD-L@UBVM
From: LIBWCA
Subject: Now that we're all depressed as hell...
This go wrong way, go to Pat's place. This for Mr. Whiphead.
----------------------------Original message----------------------------
Hey, man- I was thinking about puppies! What for you want to lay
yer negative energy trip on my groovy head, daddy-o? I bake you
brownies; you no like? I give you fuzzy bunny. I like you, man.
you charp, I mean it. You razor. Why you so sad allatime? Why
you no take muffler off you car, drive real fast with loud music
anna girl got her some nice long legs, ey? Why you no drink the
fine, fine local wine, sing a song with girls and beer, fall
down, get up, hit you buddy inna face with you fist? Time out to
have some bodacious fun, you go watch the lifeguards fall inna sand,
you ride you big ol' hog inna church, man. You so sad, it make me
sad. I no like.
Angel-Eyes
========================================================================
Date: Wed, 7 Oct 1992 16:48:15 EDT
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: <LIBJRM>
Subject: oh silly me
were it not for LIBALP, methinks I'd never find my way around.
he's so helpful.
but I think I should tell you, robert h, what I tried (and failed) to
tell you by posting to the wrong list (where am I again?)
your angst
it drives me wild
don't stop
oh please don't stop
oooooooooohhhhhhh
aaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh
========================================================================
Date: Wed, 7 Oct 1992 17:41:37 EDT
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: "(Robert Holder)" <WHIPLASH>
Subject: Re: oh silly me
i'd give in if you'd let me; i would have
long ago. but you won't. are you talking
about who i am or what i do? it sounds to
me like you are talking about who i am, that
i am not good enough. you obviously don't
need me here. you got all your bases covered,
right? and you can't make me stay. so i'm
off to my little world--you know, that SUBset
of YOUR world. i am not strong enough to
take your comments in stride. i have let them
inside where they make me hate you. you are
all very strong. you can all play this game.
well i can't. i'm leaving, and you can think
whatever you want about me. i think you guys
are dead on the inside. don't follow me and
DON'T BRING ME BACK AGAIN.
========================================================================
Date: Wed, 7 Oct 1992 18:50:02 EDT
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: "(Robert Holder)" <WHIPLASH>
Subject: i tried sending this to cheating but it bounced
CHEATING:
hi. look, i'm really sorry to bring such trouble
to the list. i came here to have fun.
I didn't want to have ANOTHER time-wasting, energy-
sucking PROBLEM on my hands.
also i wanted to say thanks for the friendly
comments.
i could just stay and listen, you know, ABSORB THE
WISDOM, but if the content is just
1) some dumb sap posts something
2) the clubby clique smashes them for being inane
dolts
...then i will pass. I'll stick with my pathetic
puppies and fuzzy bunnies.
take care cheating, and don't get too involved in
this stupid energy wasting argument.
see you later!
robert h
PS- i don't know if it was you who re-subscribed me, but
please don't do it again, or try to circumvent my cron job
by signing me up on other LISTSERVers. I can crank up my
crontab to run my signoff every minute if i need to... or
i can change my login id... etc. etc.
I'll leave it every fifteen minutes like it is for a day
or so to make sure i stay out of the country club.
========================================================================
Date: Wed, 7 Oct 1992 22:06:00 EDT
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: LIBALP
Subject: We all gotta ask ourselves:
What's eating Rob?
alp
========================================================================
Date: Wed, 7 Oct 1992 15:35:00 -05
Sender: SUNY/Stony Brook Literary Underground<SBRHYM-L@SBCCVM.BITNET>
From: Merciful Lee Dickens <DICKENS>
Subject: SUCH LANGUAGE!
Robert, Robert, Robert. What are we going to do with you?
Do you eat out of that mouth? Do you kiss your girlfriend with that
mouth? You should wash that mouth with soap. Right now.
Then we think it would be a good idea for you to march yourself
upstairs, young man, put your jommies on and go right to bed without
your evening gruel.
Imagine - saying the "f" word in front of poor old doddering Cheating!
How rude. We shan't tolerate that kind of behavior in future, young
Whiplash, be well advised.
Sternly,
Merciful Lee Dickens
Net Character
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